I had it all planned out – that’s what I do, I plan. I plan and plan and plan, and of course plans are the joke of the Universe. But either way, that is what I do.
I had it all planned out.
Graduate high school, move to Wales, live in Granny’s big house on top of the hill in the tiny village and write, all along opening an herbal/coffee shop to supplement the income. Fail-proof plan, right?
Well, I got somewhat far – I graduated high school and ten days later I was on a plane with all my stuff flying from Washington state to Manchester. Long story short, after a month of traveling around I got to my Granny’s and moved right in and got a job as a waitress. It wasn’t a big deal, I’d worked there before. I lived in Granny’s for a year or so before finding my own place, as well as an American herbal college that offered long distance study options. So I did my coursework, gave up on being an herbalist and became dead set on nutrition (which was still offered through the school). I became certified in both nutrition and herbalism before moving on to work toward my BA in Holistic Healing.
Wales kind of sucked. I mean, there was some awesome, but for the most part it sucked, so I came home. I have never been so happy to see trees in my life! I was taking photos of them every chance I took. I hugged them – I was the epitome of a tree-hugging hippie! I even had dreadlocks by this time (still have them!). It was 2009, four years after I had graduated.
I continued doing the long distance study thing, and was loving it. But then the rules in California changed and my school was shut down – mid course! The course had already been paid for up-front. There was no refund option. So, my BA was never achieved. The icing on the cake was that because of the style of the courses, they were non-transferable, which meant that if I wanted to proceed in a degree in natural health, I was going to have to start all over.
Not a big deal though. I get butt-hurt pretty easy, and this was one of those times. I couldn’t even continue writing research articles as I had been doing on any of the related topics. In fact, all my writing stopped all together. I just decided to wait, knowing that my stubbornness and frustration would pass, I just needed to be patient.
As it does, time went on, and i became wrapped up in the general grind of things, working in Direct care with Adults with Developmental Disabilities for four years, then “retiring” to manage a coffee shop in the middle of no-where. It was beautiful though, a really good tourist spot. My current boyfriend (of nearly two years) and I both worked there, and had found it rewarding in its own odd and stressful way (a whole long story that really doesn’t belong here, not when we’re just getting to meet each other!)
Then, one day, without warning, at a management meeting, our boss came to us all and announced that some cut-backs would be happening. He proceeded to list off five names, and said they were the ones that would have a job at the end of the day. Neither my boyfriend’s nor my name was on that list. In fact, they were closing down the coffee house entirely.
As it was, my boyfriend was leaving that day for Mexico for a week with his family, so I was left to deal with the shock on my own. Many ideas had gone through my head as to what to do, where to apply next, if I could handle the whole searching-for-a-new-job stress.
The most shocking of it all was that I was relieved! I couldn’t believe it! All that kept going through my head was “oh thank God!”
Getting back on the general retail and server horse was not what I needed to be doing. This is a time for action, this is a time for change. I could go anywhere, do anything, break the mold!
Then I realized. It’s time. It is absolutely time. I can’t just do it a little, nothing falling short of all the way. And yes indeed, I’m on my way.
I enrolled in school.
[Hopefully] April 4th, at the age of 27 and 9 years after traditional schooling, will be my first day of Spring Quarter at the local community college. I’ll be getting my core classes out of the way before I apply to get into Western Washington University to begin the long, grueling work of getting my Masters Degree in English.
And yes Virginia, I am shitting myself.