After reading several blogs, reviewing several authors that I admire, I realized they all have one thing in common (you know, aside from writing):
They all have a Vice
Some are raging alcoholics, or just philosophical alcoholics; some are smokers; some are drug addicts (I hear tell that for a while Stephen King would lock himself in the attic with a big bag of coke and bang out a novel in a weekend…I have nothing to back this up, it’s just what I’ve heard).
So I wondered, what Vice is best suited for me?
My boyfriend was asking me what I was noting about in my journal on the drive back from Spokane. I told him – basically what you just read.
“How about your vice is sobriety.”
“That’s boring!” I exclaimed. “No writer is just a complete straight edge. Even those health nuts that meditate all the time and talk about consciousness – their vice is meditation, experiencing a different level of consciousness – if they haven’t already taken hallucinogens to begin with.”
“But you’re not straight edge. You drink, you do the occasional hallucinogens, smoke the occasional pot, and you drink. let your vice be occasionally recreational.”
I was feeling like he wasn’t getting it.
Maybe it’s me that isn’t getting it.
I went back to my phone, where I had a partial post written on the WordPress app.
“How about tech?”
“What do you mean Tech?”
“You’re addicted to technology.”
I became defensive. “I am not!”
“You’re constantly on your phone,” he insisted.
“I beg to differ. Just because you didn’t use your smartphone to it’s fullest extent does not make me addicted to my phone! I’m writing on here, I’m networking to get my writing out there, I am researching – that’s not fair.”
“You’re constantly on there. And when you’re not on there, you’re on your lap top, even when we’re watching TV.”
The truth is, yes, I am. I am constantly on one form of technology or another – especially while we’re watching TV. I get bored when I’m watching shows. I can’t just sit motionless and stare at a glowing box. It drives me crazy and I can feel myself turning into mush. I need something to do with my hands. I need something more going on with my brain than television. So, I am looking up things on my phone, I’m holding conversations, I’m taking notes for blogging ideas, I’m playing games – anything to keep my mind active while sitting on the couch.
It used to be that I would knit, or draw, or make jewelry. I don’t draw these days, I feel like it’s a lost art of mine that was never that skillful to begin with, and I don’t have any supplies for knitting or making jewelry – and especially now, I can’t afford the extra expense. However, my phone and my computer provide that bit of multi-tasking I need.
Perhaps because I was so defensive about it, I am addicted to it.
Multi-tasking? Or Addiction? At this point, I could argue both, but I’m not sure which is right.